PROMPT RESPONSE CHRISTMAS TWOFER
Christmas is Coming — the Goose is Getting Fat
And so am I!
Hollie Petit, Ph.D. and Toni Greathouse have each set a challenge/prompt for December and because I am way too excited to buckle down and do anything properly, I decided to appease them both and mix it up a bit.
Toni set a Christmas This or That Challenge which she purloined from somewhere on Medium. Honestly, does she really expect me to do this properly? LOL. 😁
That lady has a big lot to learn!
Questions with nifty bullet points — if I can make the Medium Editor behave:
· Christmas Eve or Christmas Day?
This is first off the rank and I can’t answer it.
The question should be — What do you like best? All of the days in December before and following the Saturday before Christmas, Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, or Boxing Day?
And I still can’t answer it!
We have such a big blended family that we have multiple Christmas Days and each one is as individual as the person or persons hosting the party.
I love ’em all — also love the post-Christmas period of lounging around like a lizard baking, visiting the beach, walking, exploring, binging movies/TV series, and flatly refusing to cook, clean or make the bed for a week. Yay!
You filthy animal!
· Santa or No Santa
What? You serious?
Of course, there’s a Santa! Isn’t there? OMG! What are you saying?
Dee….People are suggesting there’s no Santa! What’s that you say? Off with their heads …? Oh, I knew I made you Consort to the Queen of the Southern Hemisphere’s for a reason!
· Naughty or Nice?
That’s like asking me to choose between the gorgeous May More 💜(naughty) or nylon undies with scratchy lace — nice to look at but buggers of things to wear. No contest!
· Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate?
Yes
· Velvet or Fur?
Honestly, this question is plain el dumb-oh!
Doesn’t it depend on whether a person is wearing velvet or fur, finding it growing on their leftover ham or languishing in the crotch of their nylon undies with scratchy lace?
I certainly wouldn’t be wearing velvet or fur in 30C degree heat with 95% humidity and if I did, you could be certain there would be something nasty growing in my aforementioned gruds.
· Red or White?
Wot?
· Peppermint or Cinnamon?
I’m tempted to ask, “Wot?” again, but that would be lazy.
What is it that you want me to put peppermint or cinnamon on?
There. Not so lazy!
· Frosty or Rudolph
If I’m choosing romantic companionship, it’s a no-brainer. 30C degree heat with 95% humidity — remember? I’m not into romancing lukewarm puddles.
Let me clarify that. Warm-blooded mammal versus a wet hat, carrot, and two sticks. You figure it out.
Hmm, on thinking about it, I might have to spend a bit more time deciding. 🔥🔥 How am I doin’, May?
· Mistletoe or Mommy Mummy/Nana Kissing Santa Claus?
What do you reckon?
· Real or Fake Tree?
I kinda like the idea of a real tree but I haven’t had one since I brought 20 redback spiders into the house a week before Christmas, forty years ago. That was when I invested in a fake tree. It’s been fake ever since.
Anyway, you try keeping a real tree alive for more than twenty-four hours in the aforementioned climate conditions.
· Wrapped or Bagged?
Bagged, if I’m doing it, wrapped if it’s for me. Thank you so much for showing me the love, family!
· Home for the Holidays or Christmas Abroad?
Seriously? After everything, I’ve written to this point.
· Prancer or Dancer?
Oh for Pete’s sake! When will this ever end?
· Let It Snow or Mele Kalikimaka?
This one:
· Baubles or Garland?
Yes, and tinsel, and old motheaten ornaments made by the kids fifty years ago, and the gold thingummy I picked up in Orlando in 2001 from the Kennedy Space Centre. No popcorn strings, though — it brings the ants inside!
· Gas or Wood-burning?
How many more times do I have to mention the climate here?
The question should be air conditioning or fan? Duh!
· City or Rural:
Wherever the party is.
· Turkey or Roast Beast?
Turkey? I’ve already told you I won’t travel overseas at Christmas time. Sigh.
Whatever is being dished up — roast, hot or cold, traditional, or international. It’s all good! 🍹🍤🥑🍗Which is why I’m getting fat!
· Elf or the Grinch
Elf for the older ones, Grinch for the young ones.
Truthfully, I’ve seen The Grinch so many times with the kiddlies, I’m fed up to the green gills with it!
· Cookies or Fudge
🤢🤢🤢I’m just reworking this story having come in the door from a Christmas party, stuffed full of everything laid out on the delicious buffet!
This brings me to Hollie’s prompt suggestion, and I quote:
We want to hear your wildest holiday stories — fact or fiction. Give us those tales of days past that you continue to tell year after year. Perhaps you had one of those crazy drunken uncles who indulges in too many spirits and then mistakes a gift bag for a sick sack.
One memory springs to mind when I read the above.
Often, during the Christmas Season, Great Aunt Myrtle would visit my childhood home, drink too much and pee on my parents’ lounge suite.
My mother was appalled by this repeated behaviour but my father did not want to ban anyone over the festivities.
Of course, Great Aunt Myrtle was from my father’s side of the family! 😁
I thought Great Aunt Myrtle was good value!
In further reply to Hollie, I would like to direct you, dear reader, to my spiffy bulleted points above.
That list embodies the joy of Christmases of years gone by, celebrated with family, friends and anybody else who happened to be in the neighbourhood. The memories of those events will stay forever in my heart.
I wish you all a wonderful Festive Season, if I haven’t already, and a happy and prosperous 2023! 💙💦
Thank you Hollie Petit, Ph.D. for Everything Fun — a great place for all our nonsensical hijinks.
Thanks also to Toni Greathouse for assisting Hollie and for encouraging all the writers on EF.
Annie Trevaskis skipped a few steps when she presented her fun version. 🤗
I believe this is the original challenge from Denise Kendig. Thanks, Denise, I think.
